Hating on Psychic Sylvia Browne

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Wednesday, May 8th, 2013, 8:25am
Categories: Mouth Diarrhea

Psychic Crime Buster Drawing
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Image By: Mike Licht | Source
Yo dudes

I just caught the story about "Amanda Berry", a girl kidnapped for 10 years who was finally rescued recently (link). Its really nice to see someone stay alive so long and finally get fee, yet at the same time sucks that they were even kidnapped in the first place.

Then there's someone called "Sylvia Browne" (website) who apparently is a self proclaimed psychic, who regularly appears (or appeared, I'm not sure) on the Montel Williams show to give psychic advice and readings to people.

In the last couple of days, people are realizing that back in 2004, Sylvia Brown incorrectly predicted that Amanda Berry was dead, right on the show. She seriously told Amanda's mother that Amanda was dead.

Now the internet is bringing a shit storm on Sylvia Browne.

I've been reading tweets and posts attacking her. People were writing on her facebook page that she should just admit she's a fake. People are angry as shit. Its so bad, that when I went to find her facebook page, it had already been taken down, presumably because she couldn't keep up with all the negative comments.

Okay tell me if I'm off base here... but I'm not upset with Sylvia Browne.... and I really wonder why anyone else is.

I mean why the fuck do people still believe in psychics anyway? The whole concept is so easy to disprove. If psychics were legit, they'd all be rich and not even working as psychics, plain and simple. Think of even just a few ways you could leverage psychic ability:
  • Predict the lottery (no brainer)
  • Predict the stock market
  • Predict where the richest 'believers' are hanging out, find them and charge them huge huge fees
  • Predicting what small business they should start, and how to run it to become mega-successful
  • Predicting how/where to meet the owner of some huge company who will end up paying the psychic loads of money for some HR/PR position
  • Avoid any personal problems, accidents, injuries
  • Predicting and stopping where people are going to get hurt, robbed, etc
  • Have the foresight to avoid being slapped directly in the face


There are so many logical reasons that psychics are full of crap, that I could just sit here and go on and on and on. I typed up that list without even pausing, and I only stopped because I got fucking bored already. And don't even try to keep a straight face while saying that psychics aren't allowed to use their abilities for personal gain - they all want money for their services.

People who 'believe', do so because they want to believe, not because what they believe is true. There is a distinction. For a psychic to be convincing, you've got to play into their little game - feed them information (talking with them during your your story, nonverbal cues, etc), and ignore the general statistics at play when you ignore a misread here and there, or that most of their predictions are highly probably situations in the average person to begin with, or leave the timeline open ended so you can't actually say with finality that something didn't come true until you're actually on your deathbed in 50 years.

Oh oh wait, I'm getting a vision. At least once in your life you'll get into an auto accident looooooooooool

There are just so many easy ways to snap out of the whole "I believe in psychics" thing, its amazing to me that people still buy into it.

Therefore I don't blame Sylvia Browne and other psychics. I'm sure they understand they're full of shit. I really don't believe someone can use so many proven psychological techniques in order to dupe people, without being aware that those tactics are disproofs of psychic abilities in themselves.

Sylvia Browne is a smart business woman, or at least someone in her crew is. She is just playing her game of life a little bit smarter than the rest of us. She has a great income and doesn't have to sit in a cubicle 40 hours a week. Think about it.

So if you or someone you know has been duped by a psychic... well I am sorry - that does suck. I was a believer once too, and I know how it feels to so badly want that fantasy to be true.

But in the end, we have only ourselves to blame.

Bitchesssssssssss

~Mike Peralta


Edit: Holy shit, I just heard her voice for the first time. It sounds like her vocal cords have been surgically replaced with actual cigarette butts. Literally.

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Mike Peralta is an independent musician and you should follow him on Twitter (@MikePeralta) and Instagram (@MikePeraltaMusic), then subscribe to his blog just a bit below this text!
Current avatar photo by Heinz von Bockelmann (CC by 2.0, modified by Mike Peralta)

Next in 'Mouth Diarrhea' : My Friend From Riverside >>>
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